When we can understand ourselves, we can learn that we'll never get what we want until we start learning how to want what we get, and what we already have.
"Some people may argue they have nothing to heal from. But in reality we all have our own trauma"
My Guest Anna, on this episode is essentially in the business of transforming people, helping them understand that it's not actually about what they need to do, but what they need to UNDO to find the peace, joy, and pleasure they're continually seeking. I asked Anna some core questions in this episode, primarily around the topic of Healing, and how we choose to heal. What is apparent is that it's not the method we use to heal, but the healing itself which is crucial. If we avoid healing our wounds, our trauma's and attending to our neglected inner child, those same wounds keep appearing in life throughout adulthood. It sounds weird, but weird doesn't equal to being untrue.
A huge lesson I have learnt in my life coaching training is to be aware of core values and beliefs and how these beliefs come to life in our everyday. The first question we need to ask is, whose belief is this? Is this mine? Or could it be my parents belief, or teachers, or sibling or friend? Why is this key? Because it contains valuable information. Information which frees us from being held hostage to that belief and refusing to change, and therefore refusing to grow. I always say growth and change is uncomfortable. It isn't routine and it isn't what we know, and ultimately us humans love familiarity. We do not all have an innate desire to try new things. This is the same for new behaviour and new thinking. To create new thoughts to achieve a new outcome, we need to renew our mind. Renewing our mind and rewiring our brain takes some self assessment and reflection. We need to know the old thoughts. We need to know the current thoughts, if they differ from the old. We need to ask ourselves where did this thought come from? Getting curious is key! Why do we assume we know everything about ourselves? Without deep diving I can assure you don't and you will understand what I mean once you begin the journey of doing the work by doing the healing.
Some people may argue they have nothing to heal from. But in reality we all have our own trauma. It could seem small to you but until we really allow ourselves to get vulnerable, go there and unravel the thing's we have buried, we just won't know. So I encourage you right now to get curious about those beliefs you have. Get to know yourself better!
"...until we really allow ourselves to get vulnerable, go there and unravel the thing's we have buried, we just won't know."
While it is much easier to run away from the truth, once we own our truth a beautiful, magical thing happens. A shift. And again, the shift might initially feel uncomfortable but it offers a transcendence into a new phase of being a different, more refined version of ourselves. That's the version we need. We are not growing to get better for anyone else other than ourselves. Do yourself a favour today, stop in your tracks right now and have a conversation with the person in the mirror.